The Chapters of My Life

Kyle || 757 || Loyal to V.G.D. <3 || Based God || '97|| Doing the most always. || Hakuna Matata || Living life like a child ||
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3. September 2014

Hey baby just dropping by to say I love you and i miss you muchu 😘 20 months growing strong. I’m blessed to have you by my side. Truly am. I will always have the faith in us. Stay strong because we have god on our side leading us through. Mahal kita my love.

In the end no matter what, I’m selfish. I’m a way better employee, than a brother. I’m a way better worker, than a son. I’m way better at being alone, than being part of a family. I’m honestly so selfish. I can’t do simple things an individual in the family should be doing. My parents are proud of me except when it comes to family. I have a job and work 30+ hours a week even during school. I’m independent, great student, and have a great sense of duty of doing what needs to be done. But … I’m not a good brother, I wish I could watch and care for my siblings. I only can play with them and that’s it really. I get frustrated and mad with them, and push them away. I’m not a good son, in a way I’m good at doing what my parents say, but once they’re quiet I do what I want as if I’m on my own and I never do anything for them. I do more chores like anyone else, I don’t hurt them with bad behavior, but I most definitely don’t help them until prompted to. I don’t help them pay bills, I don’t help them by watching my siblings, I don’t help. In the end no matter what, I’m selfish.

I’m about to let it all go

I’m the alone once again. I’m not afraid of being alone, I actually like it. But I hate the fact that I’m the only alone. I’ve lost major groups of friends, but you can’t keep them all. I’m still well respected and people aren’t mad to have me around, but in the end I’m alone. I love to see my friends be happy with everyone around them, yet I’m jealous of that. I’m honestly I’m jealous. I don’t think going out it’s gonna solve my problems. HA. Being alone won’t solve them either. People talking to me won’t solve it. But me yelling at God to fix my mind will probably work. Also why can’t people see what they have. I know I have lots. Why can’t others

So much regret.

He gave me so many warning and chances.

Forgive me God. Clear my mind. I rest this in your hands.

I’m a disgrace for everything I used to stand for.

I’m too prideful to admit I’m the one causing problems.